Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Mirror Mirror...shut the hell up!

Emerging from the shower I figured I'd just throw myself together.

"No make-up today," I thought to myself.

And then before I knew it, I was doing just that. eyeballs and mirror are in cahoots and notice a crisis well before my brain does and so they determined otherwise.

I was actually in the middle of applying foundation before I realized what was happening.

After giving myself some very stern eyebrows in the mirror, I looked a little closer and had to would, in fact, be a good make-up day.

So here I am now, with a question to my body:

"Why is it that I go to bed and go through the trouble of 'sleeping' only to wake up and look as if I've been awake for 3 days straight?"

OK...maybe TWO questions:

"And...why do I go through all that [see above] only to FEEL as if I've been awake for that long as well?"

Oh, dear...dear body, why must you make me wiggle my middle finger and hurl creative expletives at you?

There is not nearly enough concealer on the planet to undo the construction project you have going on under my eyes. Sigh....

Is it really so much to ask for a nights sleep that leaves me actually feeling rested in the morning? If I'm going to lay there 'sleeping' for that many hours then you owe it to me.

Now, if you'll excuse me I'm heading to the store for some Spackle.

And...some lower wattage light bulbs.


  1. i scare myself if i look too closely in the mirror. haha! spackle! haha! our 86 year old friend says the ladies at manor park use preparation h to smooth their wrinkles!

  2. I have those mornings when no amount of make-up is going to save me. Especially under the eyes! Is there a secret to looking rejuvenated?

  3. Mirrors are not usually my friend. Low lighting helps ;)

  4. Ha-ha! A student stopped by the other day and told me it didn't really matter about my appearance, since no one cares what English teachers look like. Gee, thanks.

    Also, here's a bizarre tip from a few years ago that I never tried: fill the sink with ice and water. Put on a snorkle. Immerse face under ice water for two minutes. Voila-- fresh, rosy, puffy free complexion.
    I am not making this up-- I think it was in Cosmo.

  5. LMAO about putting on a snorkle! I mean, who doesn't have one, right?!
    I've had an hour and a half of sleep and am now up with the baby watching Dora (2:30 am) and working. I can guarantee I won't feel *much* worse than if I had slept for 8 hours. It just seems like sleep isn't doing what it should for me lately, too.
    I only wear make-up when I go out of the house.