I hate that the package man (a.k.a UPS, FED-X, etc) drives by my house. I hate even more when he/she stops on my street, steps from my own doorway...only to deliver a package to someone else.
I want him to stop here (him, because that is all I have in my hood...him drivers).
I want packages and presents and cards and letters. Daily.
I want a pair of roller skates. Fancy ones.
I want to wear a tutu when I go to the grocery store and a princess tiara.
Or a fireman outfit, complete with plastic ax. Or, a ninja. With an ax. And a tutu, but black...of course. I'll leave the bling at home, because ninjas don't bling...they need to be stealth-like.
I want to buy all the office supplies that my little heart desires and fill up an entire wall of Post-It notes that utter nothing but words of encouragement and love. And binders, folders, colored tabs and tape, and stamps...I want to stamp things and hear *ka-thunk*...and then highlight it in every color.
I want to push the little shopping cart meant for kids.
I want a bell and tall red flag for my bike and a playing card in the spokes. I want to fly down the road with my bike singing, "rat-a-tat-tat".
I want to wear glitter eyeliner every day.
And wear a miniskirt when I'm 70.
I want to lay on the beach and completely cover myself in sand.
I want to take a bubble bath that completely obscures me...so many bubbles that you'd think I slipped down the drain.
I want ruby red slippers, without having a house fall on me to get them.
I want to wear a ball gown that is frothy and sparkly and glimmery.
I want to play Hot Lava on the new play structure at the park. And then have it transform into a Peter Pan flying pirate ship destined for Alpha Centauri!
I want to gather all the blankets and pillows in the house and create the biggest fort ever imagined - with popcorn and hot cocoa.
I DON'T want to fold up all those blankets or vacuum up the popcorn.
I want to be a princess, that kicks ass...that fights her battles on roller skates, with a poking stick in one hand and a cast iron skillet in the other - because both of them will leave SUCH a mark - in a tulle skirt with a satin embroidered bodice...and tiara. A modern version of the new Snow White and the Huntsman....but without the huntsman, 'cause I'm a big girl and can take care of myself. Plus, I doubt that a huntsman would appreciate having to wear roller skates and a tiara into battle. If he only knew that REAL men don't mind being bedazzled.
"Why," you ask, "did you create such a list?"
Because...is how I'll answer.
Because...someone will read it and it will make them happy.
Because...then they'll start imagining their own list.
Because...an imagination is a terrible thing to keep locked up in side ones brain.