Thursday, December 01, 2011

The Land of Almost

The word _almost_ means (roughly): very nearly; all but..

My life has been full of very nearly.  As has every one, I imagine.

In recent years I was approached by a professor to work on a special project, one that would require writing about art and then submitting for publication. This professor had selected two students that she said, "I really want to work with". You can, no doubt, imagine my excitement and trepidation - because there is my whole issue with confidence.

But she had selected me. As in M and E. 


And then that was it. Project fizzled without even being inflated.

Was it me? Or, was it as she said, just not good timing - she was just too busy?

You'll say the latter. But, what if it was the former? What if she re-thunk it? Which, can you blame her - I did just use "re-thunk" after all...perhaps she had a premonition of my proclivity to make up words?  

But I'm over it. I've moved on. I only brought it up as an example. 


Fast forward to now, or a few weeks ago from now (OK, maybe it was structuring sentences like this one that put the professor off?) and I'm approached by someone to syndicate a previous post of mine. 

So, Melissa dredges up the old excitement again and thinks, "Maybe? This time? You think?"  As is typical, I was sure this person had mistaken my post for something written by someone else. But...she DID reference my title, so...*maybe* this was real?

And then there is an exchange of emails and tweaking of things on the site to allow me to submit the post - the reality of real-ness sets in.

Then nothing.

And so I'm left to wonder: Did she have a sudden stroke of reality and decide it was NOT the post she thought? Was it poo-poo'd by others? Or, am I on the "To-Contact" list of a very busy person who will eventually contact me and I need to not be such a worry-wart pest? I'm fine with the latter, because that is life in the working world and priorities need to be set (and I can be a bit of a pest...I just see it as being, um, persistent).

What if it isn't the later? What if it was the former?  Again...

And so, I am tucking these experiences away and sending them off to live in the land of Almost to (hopefully) eventually fade from memory (and with my memory, that should be blissfully soon)

What "Almost" do you carry with you?
Have you all but made peace with it?
Or, have you really made peace?

This post was written yesterday and scheduled
to publish early this morning. I had to RUSH in
and stop it because:
She still wants to schedule my post
To be seen by people.
Living, breathing...ALIVE people
And so, it would seem,
I'm ALMOST there....
Stay tuned.



    I can't think of any almost, unless you want to count the fact that I know I'm almost close to having some almost.

  2. Woo hoo!!! congrats :) i was a pest when AirTran asked to use one of my photographs. "did you decide yet?" "which picture will you use?" "can you send me a copy of the go magazine you print me in?" finally got answers to all my questions except the last one.. yes i am a pest.

    WOO HOO! you are almost published! woot!

  3. Congrats, sweetie. You deserve all good things and recognition for your writing!

  4. ElaineR.N.10:43 AM

    Congrats! No almost moments come to mind because I usually think that all things happen for a reason, which moves you to a better place.

  5. Anonymous12:35 PM


    I love yer mind and I love that you're getting some recognition for it.

    A. for Aliesha, not Anonymous (and for "almost maybe thinking about starting that blogger account)


    And stop second guessing yourself :).

  7. Anonymous3:04 PM

    I know the feeling of being chosen, only to be discouraged later, and never know if to believe the reason. Sigh!

    But it is wonderful, if nothing else, you have been noticed, Melissa. And your real chance will come!


  8. Well there you go! When I was younger, I let a lot of things go by in life because I was a scaredy-cat. But when it comes to writing stuff, I have found that sometimes you actually have to forget all about it and move on before something will happen! I had a newspaper editor call me a YEAR after I'd sent her a piece, saying she loved it and had been waiting for the right time. So you never know!!

  9. Geez- did I forget to say congratulations????? I think you are an amazing writer, and I'd pay money to read you in a daily column.