Thursday, April 17, 2008

Wha-huh?

The 'Wha-huh?' is a combination of what and huh. Both of which are typical responses you'd hear from someone who didn't quit catch what you just said during a conversation.

They might say it separately, or possibly run it together as I've done in the title. Either way, the person uttering the statement is not listening to you.

You can thank my Speech class for this blog. The thoughts I'm about to put into print have been my own for a long time, but I will give credit to my Communications textbook for giving me the inspiration to finally give them a voice.

I don't know if it's society today or if it's me and I'm honestly not sure I want to know. See, if it's society, then I can accept that....as annoying as it is. But, if it is me, then...well...that just hurts.

My beef? It's the Lost Art of Listening. I want to know why it's impossible. Why can't it be done? Why is it that when I have a conversation with you, you are scanning the room and looking everywhere but at me? I don't want you to stare, but please at least look interested in what I'm saying. I mean, you initiated the conversation, so pay attention when I answer.

And when we are talking, let's share the spotlight. It's all about...well...us. Not just you. Not just me.

And....phuullleeesss don't whip out your cell phone and call someone when I'm chatting with you. Did you really mean to send me that message of insignificance? Did you really just forget you were talking to me? That quickly? I'm still here. I don't care if you just remembered something and just HAD to call. If you forgot it in the first place, it really wasn't that important that you had to 'drop' me. And if it was, then at least say, "Oh, excuse me...I'm sorry. I just remembered something important and I'm afraid I'll forget." No harm, no foul. I just want to be acknowledged, because I will do the same for you.

Finally, why do we need to compete? What is so lacking in our lives that we need to see who is the busiest, most harried, most destitute, most....whatever? Why do you need my pity so much? I'll give it to you, gladly. I'll give it as long as you are really neglected and lacking attention, affection and genuine acceptance. But, if you just want my attention and for me to say, "Oh, you poor thing....that must be so hard!"....well, get in line....because we are women and you have many sisters in the same boat. I'll support you and lift you up, but don't try to compete with me, we all have our obstacles to overcome.

I'm saddened and sickened and hopeful. Strange combination of words, but 'hopeful' usually follows whatever emotion I experience. When it comes to communication, I am saddened that we don't do it. I'm sickened that when we do, we need to control it and own it and monopolize it. And I'm hopeful that it will continue to live and evolve. At one time or another, I've been guilty of all of the above. I will put every effort into not being that person again.

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