Friday, May 11, 2012

Oh, Like You've Never Had Godzilla In Your Ear...

Waking up to a fluttering noise near ones ear is immensely un-fun.

And when one realizes that the fluttering noise resides INSIDE the ear, it becomes a remarkably disturbing scenario.

The fluttering, a sound similar to standing on a very windy beach with a touch of swimmers ear, could only mean one thing was happening inside my ear:

 Picture borrowed from

This can be THE ONLY logical answer, am I right?

It's the middle of the night and I can't sleep, because...really...who can when you have such an epic battle raging in your ear. I'm also a bit torn on who to root for - Godzilla is trying to protect the devastated town, because deep down you know that he just wants to be loved and accepted and to live quietly in some kid's aquarium like all the other pet lizards.  But Mothra? Mothra has cool wings.

See...tough decision.

By now, as the middle of the night crawls toward the wee hours of the morning, the fluttering becomes more urgent so I wake up Hubbypants and ask him to shine a light inside my ear to see if he can tell who's winning...I might want to place a bet, we could use the extra money for the remodel.

Nutin', he can't see a damn thing. Meh...

Now I'm up, might as well go potty - and wouldn't you know it! The whirling dervish in my ear reaches a crescendo and...and...and...

I discover that THIS is the source of all the hullabaloo. The little bugger must have seen the light and thought it might as well head to bug heaven.

I had been violated by a freakin' silverfish.

Soooo anticlimactic, ya know?

Damn thing fell right out of my ear and landed on the bathroom floor - that is, right after I felt it emerge and then did the squealing, "Getitoffmegetitoffme" dance we all do when we feel something crawling on us.

I am here to tell you that a person does not quickly recover from such a revelation, sleep was not forthcoming after this discovery...OH.NO. Somehow Hubbypants sensed my distress and offered to hold my breasts, the kind and supportive giver that he is.

There is a good chance that I'll need to fill my day with errands and shopping just to keep myself awake after so little sleep. And there is an equally good chance that I'll be sleeping with earplugs for the rest of my life.

Peace out!


  1. EWWWWW!!!! AHHHHH!!! GAH!!!! I'm going to have nightmares, thank you very much. *shivers*

  2. AAAAAAA!! EW EW EW!! I think I'd rather deal with zombies!!

    1. Indeed! Zombies I can (maybe) outrun...but ear bugs? Ack!

  3. I'm going to join the gaggle of "ewwing" people - EWWWWW!!!!!!! No, no, no, no!! What was it, how did it, EWWW!

    So now, not only do we eat spiders in our sleep, but silverfish can try to control our brains after entering our heads through our ears.

    I shall be joining you in the earplugs while sleeping now. *shudder*

    1. Yeah, I'm so not into bugs! I realize they are everywhere, always...but I'd like them to take 3(million little bug) steps back and keep a good distance away from my personal space!

  4. Anonymous11:51 AM

    I'll never sleep again.

    A. stands for insomniac, and it's all your fault

  5. Anonymous9:41 AM

    Omg what kind of ear plugs would work! Titanium do u think! I can't think about this any more. I will freak out. Need to hav more coffee and maybe a chocolate donut to block it out. Yes that will calm me. It is not right to do expose me to this kind of stress I'm going to be 60 soon . Jeezzz

    1. Hahahaha! Yes, it is very, very, VERY disturbing and a chocolate donut would make it SO MUCH BETTER!

  6. All of us will be using ear plugs!! As disgusting as your find was, I had to laugh over your husband's comforting technique. Very common....

  7. Can't sleep. Silverfish will invade me.

    Oh. My. Freaking. GAWD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  8. Thank gawd for hubby pants... what a guy ;-)