Monday, August 22, 2011

Aw...NUTS!

I think my email is broken.

There were no job offers this morning.

I've sent an email to the Google people to check that their lines aren't down...or whatever new fangled doo-hickies they use to move MY uber important messages back and forth.

Of course, if that's the case then they won't get MY email will they?

I heard there was bad weather somewhere in the world and you know how that can affect technology.

Maybe Google doesn't know about it, like maybe they don't watch the Weather channel or check Wunderground.

I'm concerned about all those people that are sitting by their computers waiting for me to accept the job they offered me.

Eh, they'll be fine. I'm too busy drinking coffee, talking to the cats and surfing food blogs to worry about them right now.

Oh! I NEEEEEED to warn you of the dangers of Adele and having a mouth full of nuts.

Such a close call I had yesterday....almost choking to death.

O.k., so maybe it was a little bit more like *almost* peeing my pants from coughing so much.

But I COULD have choked to death.

There I am, blissfully singing along and getting ready to belt out "...DEEEEEEEP..." (like only Adele and I can) when all of a sudden a nut dove - all kamakazie like - down my throat.

Well, if you ever had nuts in your mouth that haven't been properly chewed and softened, then you know what a choking hazard they can be.

The best thing to do before you start belting out the tunes, is to chew your nuts very carefully and slowly - really hard nuts take longer - and when you swallow, do it twice...because there might be a little bit of nut left hiding in your mouth and you don't want any stragglers hanging around.

One of those stragglers is what almost cost me my life.

Or, rather...the need to change change my pants.

My advice...eat the soft chewy See's candy, instead of the nutted kind, before you sing...it's a lot safer.

Who knew Adele's music could be so dangerous?

Peace.













2 comments:

  1. Anonymous9:57 AM

    I prefer all things in my mouth to be nutless. Make of that what you will. Aliesha

    ReplyDelete
  2. I love nuts..all kinds of nuts.

    ReplyDelete